Thursday, 25 February 2016

Putting the "date" back in dating

I was listening to “Dear future husband” by Meghan Trainor and I thought about what I want when I do get back in the dating scene. I haven’t been on the market for a long time since I was in what I thought would be a “till death do us apart” kind of relationship but I guess he didn’t want the same thing. That aside, being almost a twenty-six year old lady, having experienced my fair share of dating and being a mom; I’m not just looking for fun but also a commitment. I want that make me feel like flowers and butterflies and all that cute shit kind of dating.

There is this new breed of men who are just lazy daters and I mean chilling in the house, never take you out, kind of lazy! But as ladies, one of our biggest weaknesses is that when we love….we really love! All the rules and expectations you had sometimes just go out the window and you accept him as he is and be content with the kind of love he offers….as long as he loves you and chooses you at the end of the day. But I don’t want to settle for less, I want the guy who takes you out, it doesn’t have to be on every other weekend but once in a while plan a romantic date for your lady…even if it’s at the end of the month when you have some mula.

If there is one thing men should know and understand, is that your lady knows your limitations and she will never expect you to take her to Hilton when you’re a hustler but you can afford to take her to the top of KICC and a to have milkshake after, then if you want to end the date at home so be it….cook a nice meal together and watch a movie while cuddling on the couch. That’s a date!

One rule of dating, it’s the thought that counts and I mean know your lady and plan something you know she will enjoy. The fact that you put a little thought into that date will score you some points. I love swimming so take me swimming at a nice quiet location on a hot sunny day. Don’t take me to a concert or rave when I’m an introvert….let’s do a quiet intimate dinner. Also, maybe this is just me but taking me to a party does not count as a date. I’m not saying don’t do it or I won’t have fun but it just won’t be a date.


As a young single mom, I appreciate the complexity of dating when you have a child because you will always be a package and not many men can handle that but if I have learnt anything in the last month since I started to open up about my last relationship…. It takes a strong serious man to commit to that and there isn’t a scarcity of them (contrary to what I thought). So even though I was hurt and I loved and lost….i wont close myself off from love. I might not be ready to get back in the game but if love knocks, I will answer and I won’t settle for less. I want to experience the date in dating. Also, I think my future husband should listen to that song; “Dear future husband” by Meghan Trainor because it pretty much sums it up minus the cooking part…. I can cook pretty well J

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