PLAN B

Love is blind, not stupid…that being said, I suggest you get comfortable because what follows is a bit out of the box marked “love”. We’ve all had our share of good and bad relationships and the one thing they all have in common is that they all end, one way or another. I like the idea of love, don’t get me wrong but I’m also a realist. Most of us keep that one guy or girl (depending on what you are into…) waiting and hoping, even when we are in a relationship just in case it goes south then they can be your plan B. If you’ve never done this, I suggest you stop reading…

I’m never without a plan B in everything I do, so why should relationships be any different? If you’re an optimist and have complete faith in plan A, good for you. Just to clarify, plan B doesn’t come into play unless plan A fails and remember, we want plan A to work because it was our first and best choice. Speaking from experience, I have had a plan B now and then (not always…sometimes I have complete faith in plan A) and I have been a plan B (clande…don’t judge).

Speaking of clandes, being a clande doesn’t necessarily mean you are plan B, it means you are giving him/her something plan A can’t. Before I digress and get into being the other woman (story for another day…), let me get back to the topic at hand. I have been in a number of relationships, some really good, some average and some I still don’t understand how and why I was in them (I know you’ve dated that one person that you look back at and wonder what you were thinking) and I give them everything I have if they are worth it but I also try where possible not to put all my eggs in one basket.

Like most girls, there are some things I will automatically expect from you if you are my man, like your love, be my lover and my best friend and all that but the four most important to me are, 1. You make me laugh, 2. Your time and attention (these two always go together, if I have time but you are distracted during that time then it doesn’t qualify.) 3. Your trust and 4. You need to know me (and I don’t mean favorite color and food or likes and dislikes, know me on a deeper level, what means the most to me, when to push boundaries and when not to and that sort of thing). The order of the last three doesn’t always hold but the first one is important…you must be able to make me laugh. I get bored easily but if you can do that, then we are good to go but I don’t expect you to try and be a standup comedian in a one man show…..if you know me (no. 4) then that won’t be that hard.

It’s a lot of work but if you can solely handle this, then I probably won’t need a plan B. Before a relationship comes to an end or if it’s just not working, there are signs, we all know when it’s over even before either of you says it out loud. This is the time to get your plan B to point A (if you know what I mean). If plan A is working quite well for a period of time, then you need to discard plan B. I don’t know how long is long enough for you to say it’s working but for me, I give it roughly ten months, unless we spend a lot of time together then maybe a little less but nothing under six months.

I know you are probably disapproving at this point but just being real, no need to sugar coat everything…but I wouldn't mind getting your two sense (leave a comment, let me know what you think)